The Secret of Success Relationship Back from The Brink of Break-up

April 27, 2008 by MiSs LiLy  
Filed under Relationship

You’ve almost pulled into Splitsville can you drive back into Loveshire and make your relationship work? You’ve been together for quite sometimes and so far your relationship was running smoothly and both of you had talked about future together. However, the sun not always bright as you hopes to be so. Lately he always talked about a new girl working in the same department where he was working. At first you might not suspect anything because you trust him and it’s not a first he story about things happening around him especially things that related to his work. The girl so friendly and they become best friend and always went out together after work.

Lately, you feel there’s something went wrong and you tried to get on with her since they’re best friend. But the true reason is to clear up your mind and give peace to your heart. The insecure feeling makes your trust to your partner a little bit groggy. After quite sometimes get along with her, you find out that she had sleepy with your boyfriend’s friend, who was living with his partner of two years. All the trust you put on their friendship disappear immediately. At this critical moment, you start to argue with him about it and spending so much time together when she obviously couldn’t be trusted. You was fighting constantly even thought he swore that nothing happened between them and because of it you started to think about ending the relationship. You love him but you feel like a shadow in the relationship. It’s hard to be someone’s girlfriend when he spending lots of time with other girl and you just his girlfriend somewhere in the background. Read more and find out whether you want to give up on the relationship or start all over again.

When You & Your Partner in Crisis

We’ve all been there. Your relationship cruising along when a weird feelings creeps up. Whether it’s feeling neglected, constant fighting or the realization that you don’t want the same things, sometimes the smallest glitch can push your relationship into meltdown. What do you do? Don’t stress because it might not be as hopeless as you think. At the moment you believe you’ve reached a dead end in your relationship are at a perfect point to turn things around. At the onset of a relationship or marriage, there’s fascination and the promise of untold happiness. At some point things change, and many relationships stop before there’ve really started. There comes a point in every relationship where we either wake up or break up.

Turn Your Love Around

When your grandma passed away, you felt so devastated and really need someone beside you and at that moment you realized how much you need him for support. When you called him, he comes for you and always stays beside you all the time. Then only you know he was too much of a good guy to let go. The insecure feeling you had before disappear and choose to give a chance to both of you and try to examine the relationship again. All the challenges you’ve been through make you feel more confident and matured enough to face future together. Whatever happens in the relationship, take each of the sad and happy moment as a lesson to make the relationship more stable and stronger. It doesn’t mean there’s no hassle in future, at least better than before.

It’s Not Him, It’s Her

Communication is one of the key factors to a successful relationship. So, it’s not surprise that many couples start to unravel because they’ve stopped talking. If you’re feeling uneasy, the first thing you should do is talk to your partner to clarify the situation. Sometimes you do need to rely on your intuition if things don’t feel right, says Anne Hollands, a couple counselor. No one will have the power to break you up if you’re communicating well with each other. If there’s any suspicion or anxiety, it needs to be talked about. Even if it is all in your head, you should still talk about it or your relationship might not survive.

When Each Other Interest is Different

You know how it goes. You meet a guy, he’s perfection, everything’s fabulous. Then, one day, you look at him and think, Who is this couch slug I’ve shacked up with? He prefer spend the whole weekend sitting down in front of TV watching movie rather than going out with you, watching movie or enjoy your friend party. The problem with drifting apart is that, most of the time, you don’t realize until it’s too late. Although it can be great having a matured boyfriend, it can be backfire when it comes to your social life. It’s common to have different goals in certain ages and if you change a lot; you really grow up. Maybe it’s can be a big issue but, you don’t have to turn into one of those nauseating couples whose lives are so in sync that they’re almost the same person. But if the only time you see each other is when you cross paths in the hallway, try devoting time to re-connecting with each other before deciding it’s over.

Should I Stay or Go

When you met someone else at the time your relationship was groggy, only one thing come up from your mind; I’m only young once and you decided to break with your boyfriend rather than wasting your time staying with someone who’s make your breath congested. But, does it the best decision you’ve ever made or you just follow your heart? Deep inside your heart you know that he was the right guy at the wrong time. After a year, you still don’t regret on your decision at all. You still wish to be together with him, but you can’t choose these things.

If you and your guy have no common interests, try to compromise. Find an activity you both enjoy so you do calculative a mutual interest and are spending time together, says Hollonds. Acknowledge that a wide age difference is a risk factor and address it. But try to avoid unrealistic expectations. If he’s a beer-swilling rugby lover, you’re not going to get him to the opera, but he might go to an art exhibition if you promise to learn what the sin bin is. Its all about meeting in the middle.

When Stress Take Over

Relationship can become shaky when you’re under stress. You expect your partner to be supportive and know exactly what to do to make you feel better. But when he doesn’t it’s easy to start thinking that you’d be better off without him. This type of situation always happen to lots of couples and when they can’t overcome the daily stress, the easy way to get the solution is by running away. Sometimes you don’t understand why you can take those drastic actions, but when you think with or without his present you also can survive. However, you’re wrong because you think at the moment where your emotions control your mind and of course this a little bit effects the decision you made.

When You Should Split Up

You love each other very much and you never think to end the relationship because a small things and of course you still discuss and talk about the problems and try to find the solutions together. Are you tempted to give your relationship another go? It’s a good thing to rethink on the relationship, but there are certain situations when it’s actually better to leave. If there’s been violence, emotional abuse or cheating, you should think extremely carefully about whether it’s the best thing for you to stay with your partner. If he seems unwilling to admit there’s a problem, or refuses to discuss it with you, that should set off warning bells in your head. Communicating and trust are the most important issues in a relationship so, if you’re not 100 percent sure what you should do, talk to a trusted friend or counselor.

Learn From The Love

If one partner is experiencing a time of major stress, it’ll put a huge strain on any relationship. Sometimes guy thinks he’s doing what he can to help, but it never seems to be enough and things go from bad to worse. If you’re taking out your frustrations on your partner, sit down and talk about it. Put mechanisms in place for dealing with it, suggests Hollonds. At various times in the relationship, you’ll need to look out for each other and put your own needs aside to make sure your partner is doing OK. It’s useful to learn different ways of dealing wit difficult situations, so you can both feel m ore supported. Although you might think the problem is too big, remember that, according to Dr Eaker Weil, Getting rid of your partner does not get rid of the problem, because half of the problem is yours. There is no perfect person or relationship out there, so stop looking for perfection and work with the partner you have.

Getting Back On Track

Whenever you feel bad about him, you always pack-and-run but after few hours or days you came back to him. Do you think what you did is the right way to maintain or improve the relationship? You do know you can’t leave him just like that. You must have a strong reason to go away forever but unfortunately you don’t. Maybe he exasperates you sometimes, but you’re not happy without him and you know that you really need him in your life. It was a real turning point in our life. Try to improve the relationship from the failure and you can do if you put all your effort on getting your relationship back on track. You can’t just quit when things get tough, you have to work together as a team to get through the bad times.

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Comments

11 Responses to “The Secret of Success Relationship Back from The Brink of Break-up”
  1. That is some really good advice. Thanks for all your help. I’ll be sure to check back for more relationship help.

  2. RBJT says:

    Great writings, sis. Keep up. Am new to blogging, but am willing to learn and looking for inspirations like the pieces you and others are writing. Since Gawai is around the corner, let my folks and I wish you Selamat Gawai ke nuan, kita sebilik sereta enggau semoa raban Dayak di sebelah dunya tu. Cheers!

  3. Adam says:

    I think romance requires effort on both partners. Little things like opening the car door, lighting some candles or even coming home with flowers usually will do the trick. Another idea to spice things up is some sexy lingerie or romantic gifts, like massage oils and sensual potions. There are so many neat items out there to experiment with, the options are endless and should be explored by couples.

  4. MiSs LiLy says:

    Hi RBJT, thanks for your very encouragable comment. Selamat hari gawai to you and all the dayaks members. Anang enda nyangkong ngirup ai pengayu.

    Hope to hear again from you soon.

  5. Jenny Muscle says:

    I have just used some of these tips and it has really help me save my relationship and i will be directing my friends here if they have any troubles than you so much

  6. I do realize this sounds very airy fairy, but from my own experience I find that, you kinda know.. inside whether the relationship is ‘right’ or not. Take some time out from each other (no I don’t mean a trial separation!), then take some time to REALLY listen to how you feel…

  7. MiSs LiLy says:

    Hi there,
    Thanks for dropping by and share with us. It was one of the way to find out your true feeling. It might take quite some times but its better than didn’t do anything.

  8. Hedhli says:

    one can always use a good advice.
    great tips i hope that i can benefit from them in current relation ship

  9. MiSs LiLy says:

    Hi Hedhli,

    Thanks for dropping by. Wish you all the best in your relationship.

  10. sunshine says:

    Good solid advice…thanks!

  11. I like the Learn From The Love part, every couple sit down and talk their problems to find a mutual area where they can co-exist.