Love SOS – Save Your Relationship, Save Your Love

When the relationship is over especially when it was ended by your partner, you tend to blame yourself and your luck. You start to criticize yourself, why bad things always happen to you and why he choose to leave you without any reason? All the question play in your mind,but how about the truth? Don’t panic. Your relationship is not dead in the water until you try to save and fix it. But, how?

You want him back. There’s a sick feeling in your stomach when you wake up and go to bed because you can’t believe it really and truly is over. But is relation a done deal or could you patch things up? That’s largely up to you. No problem is ever that big that it’s insurmountable – what makes all the difference is how you go about dealing with the fallout. Well, maybe you can try few tips here:-

Opps… before that, few point below might be happen to both of you before the break-up & how you want to get all of it back in the right way.

#1 You had a Mega Fight

With all the bad words and F*** words come out from the mouth, of course both of you have a very bad days and the thing is very big when you can’t even discuss it in proper manner. Since then you haven’t spoken and it’s been a week. You can’t stand not not knowing what’s going on. Is it over or is he just trying to make you pay for hurting his feeling? Time to bite the bullet and find out. Then, what you should do?

Don’t waste time using friends as go-betweens or trying to find out if he has mentioned his attentions to a mate – you’ll only put yourself at risk of Chinese whispers and other people’s perspectives colouring his words. To find out where you stand – call him – if you get his voice mail, don’t mince words. You can say something like a “I just wanted to talk to you to find out what’s going on. I don’t know what you’re thinking. If this silence between us means our relationship is over it would be good to say good bye face-to-face – then I can give you back your spare keys and the jumper you left at my place. I just want you to know though, that I’m hoping we can still sort things out. Could you meet me for coffee? You name and the place.”

When your guys hears this he’s at likely to want to front up to get his things and then you will hopefully be able to kiss and make up – particularly as the time you’ve spend apart will have allowed your anger towards each other to cool a little. Be careful you don’t blow it by getting the conversation off on the wrong foot. If you come in all righteous about everything he does wrong the he just want to walk away again. But, if you say “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings and I’ll like to hear what you’re thinking” – then he’s more likely to pull up chair, order a strong black and hang around to talk to you.

#2 He Kissed another Woman

Well,  if this happen with attention and he did it with another woman consciously, you should not forgive him no matter how much you love him. But, how about if he did it when he was drunk and don’t know what’s he had done. It was a wild party and he had knocked back way too many beers and was so drunk he could barely stand up. And really – well, a kiss is not the same thing as going to bed. But that doesn’t change the fact he was lusting after another woman – and you’re totally shattered that he wanted to kiss someone else instead of only having eyes for you.

What now? If the two of you really were madly in love to this point, you could end up breaking it off over something he doesn’t even remember doing (and more importantly, something that meant nothing to him). But off course if you agree to continue the relationship, will he think he can get it on with other woman wherever he wants and you’ll just forgive him every time? You can think something like:-

When he calls to apologies again, don’t let the machine take it – grab the phone and have a quick heart to heart. Ask him how he’d react if he caught you kissing another guy. when he realizes how hurtful it must be for you – point out that you’re  not sure how you’re feeling right now and you need some time to think things over. Then leave him dangling for a day or more. When you call the next time, say you need to get together to talk (this will keep him worrying for a little longer – it all helps to keep giving you the upper hand).

Once you’re actually facing him, explain that you’d like to give it another go, but you’ve lost trust in him so he’s going to have to earn it back by following some ground rules. Then set out your terms – which should include things like not drinking so much that he doesn’t know what he’s doing, making more of an effort to spend time by your side when you’re out together and not flirting with every woman in a low-cut top or miniskirt.

#3 He Heard you Talking Bad about Him.

When you two have fight, of course you will go and find your friend for sharing and sometimes when you getting so angry about him you didn’t realize that you already talking too much. You forget that you love him and always accept for who he is, how he act, what his look and how he dress. With all the anger inside you, you bitching and laughing at his expense. You didn’t realize that he stay at back door listening to your conversation with heart broken. So, how’s that? if you feel sorry, then what you should? Would he give you a second change?

Well, there’s no other way. Call and leave him a message saying how sorry you are and that what you did wash totally un-cool. Try to get him to agree to meet up with you for a coffee so you can grovel in person. To take the sting out of the situation, you have to make him believe your apology. It’s a waste of breath coming on with: “I’m sorry for everything” or “I’m sorry if you felt hurt by what I said”. Bottom line is what you said was hurtful, so to make your apology meaningful you need to own up to it. Say, “I’m sorry I said hurtful things about you – I was out of the line and I promise it won’t happen again”. If he still looks extremely dark to go to plan B: Had him a letter you’ve put time and effort to writing – to explain to him the many wonderful qualities he has and why you don’t want to lose him. If that doesn’t do the trick – ask him what it’d take to make him forgive you? Even if all he demands is that you stop gossiping so much – he may feel like he’s saved face because he had the final say.

#4 He Caught You Cheating

Well, you might get the smallest chances to be forgive but it should be depends on what you’d done. But, how about if you’d done something that really makes he angry and unforgivable? And he don’t want listen to any of your explanation and the word ended with “I can’t even look at you – it’s over – I never want to see you again.” He’s right to be angry – you know your behavior has been unforgivable – but now you realize how much he means to you and you’re worried you’ve damaged his trust in you beyond repair.

What you can do is try to start call him, but just leave a message apologizing. Then, give him a few hours or a day or two to pull himself together – anything you try to say to him now will just feel to him like you’re rubbing salt into the wound. When you call again see if you can convince him to see you. Say that even if he doesn’t want to be with you anymore you want to apologize in person for the awful thing you’ve done. When you see him, take full responsibility for your weakness. Don’t lay the blame at his feet by saying “You have neglected me and I just wanted to feel loved”. Instead, say “I was wrong – I should have come to you and explained that I’d been feeling neglected but instead I went with another guy and got the attention I was craving instead of giving you the chance to give it to me.”

Convince him how much you regret on your action because you’re so mad and never think properly before decide to cheat. Ask him to delay making a final decision about the relationship and plead with him to give it a month before he decides to end it. Ask him if he could please try to judge your relationship by how good you two mostly felt about being together before infidelity reared its ugly head. Remind him that though you did a bad thing you’re not a bad person and you’re still the same girl he fell in love with. Finally, you can suggest that you start dating again because you want the chance to make him fall in love with you all over again.

#5 You Broke It Off

You mad about him, about the relationship and the fight that just happen. You out of control and say “I’ve had enough of you, I can’t take this nay more – pack your things and get out. – it’s over.” Then, you think what just happening to yourself just now? Does what you do make any sense because you’re mad? You have no answer. The next day you felt very sick about your rash brush-off and ever since you’ve been crying constantly, wondering whether he’ll ever have you back. It’s no good sobbing on your girlfriend’s sleeve telling her how wonderful he was, what endearing little habits he had and how he’s the best guy you’ve ever dated. The boyfriend you dumped is the one who needs to hear these confessions so make contact with him as soon as you can. Write your feeling down or record them onto a disc and send them to him. Let him know in no uncertain terms that you were wrong, that you were a complete bitch, had no right to do what you did, you regret your actions and you feel you’ve made the biggest mistake of your life.

Don’t feel worried about overstating your stupidity – the more he hears how much you think you’ve stuffed up – the more it’ll help restore his ego and salve the hurt you’ve caused. Then go on to explain why you acted so impulsively, eg., you felt hurt, unloved, unneeded; you were trying to force some kind of response from him; you were testing him to see if he would fight for your relationship by trying to talk you round etc.

Now that you’ve offered him the olive branch try to give him a call; because you’ve apologized he’ll be more likely to take your call. Have him over for dinner and ask him, “If we got back together – what could I do to make the relationship happier and more fulfilling for you?” Invest time and energy into talking about is needs so that by time you get around to talking about your perspective on how your relationship could improve and why it’s worth saving – he’ll not go on the defensive. Hopefully, by the end of the night you’ll be back in his heart and hi arms.

#6 You Admitted You Fake Your Orgasms

You loved him and you want him to feel great about himself and the best way you can think is by give some compliment to him. However, when the storm come and beat your relationship, you forget about keeping secret and spell out everything. Then, he will say “I can’t believe you’ve been making a fool of me all this time. Obviously, I don’t turn you on so I’ll get out of your way and let you find a guy who is better than me in bed.”

Well, now should know that you already make a mistake that could really hurt his feeling. You’ve completely shattered his self-esteem and pride – so now you need to do a complete about face. Whatever you do – don’t tell the truth – if it’s only going to hurt him he doesn’t need to know that you came easily with every other boyfriend before him. Instead, lie, lie, lie. Tell him that you’ve long had trouble reaching orgasm and that with his help, you’re hoping you can get there. Explain that you hadn’t wanted to tell him about the problem before because you were worried he might feel hurt. – which as it turns out is exactly the way he’s responded. Then suggest you sit down and talk about things you might try to do together to help make you feel hornier. – this may include everything from a little dirty talk to covering each other with whipped cream. Once you put this kind of spin on the whole situation and turn it into an enjoyable quest for you to reach orgasm – he’s likely to feel less threatened and enjoy the chance to spice things up in the bedroom.