5 Ways To Know If Your Relationship Will Last

March 24, 2008 by  
Filed under Relationship

When a guy of your dream comes over into your life, you’re hoping for sharing the love and together chasing dreams and living happy life forever. However, sometimes love is unpredictable. We’re always making a perfect plan, but only God have the answer for all the things happening around us. The time you’d spent and all the heart you’ve been giving to maintain your relationship seems like not working according to the plan. Some couples can’t let go their partner even though they already knew the critical situation they have to face in future. Sadly to say that one sided love don’t have future because lasting relationship needs both side to cooperate, shower the love – make it grow healthy and the most important thing is the ability to understand their partner and learn to live together, to share and to trust each other. When the relationship reaches the critical peak, there’s nothing much you can do to maintain or even recall back the hackneyed love. So, take a deep look on your relationship now no matter how intimate you are and start reconsider if what you do know is enough to make it last forever. Stay with me, try below love test and rate your relationship’s long term potential if you really want it to be yours.

Love Test #1 Are You In Sync Sexually

Take two piece of paper and write down three good and three bad sexual experiences you’ve had together on separate pieces of paper. The keyword is together the last thing you need to be talking about is the fantastic sex you had with an ex. Look at the answer you got. Did you come up with the same answer or were they polar opposites? By practicing this, you can know whether you’re both enjoying the same things in bed. Having a healthy and mutually satisfying sex life is crucial to a lasting relationship. Relationship which is lacking in the sex department, their intimacy levels drop, arguments creep in and eventually everything goes pear-shaped. Normally, couples have a fantastic sack session but then forget all about the ingredients that went into making sex so earth-shattering. Analyzing what made the bad experiences so unpleasant can help couples to exclude bad elements from their sex life.

Love Test #2 Do You Fight Fair?

Do you ever face a kind of situation where your boyfriend had broken his promise to have a special candle light dinner together? You’ve cooked a special meal, but he doesn’t arrive, without so much as a phone call. We’re not talking about over reaction to throw a massive hissy fit and chuck the now-cold spaghetti carbonara across the room. The ability to resolve arguments is a strong key to maintain the relationship. Couples who trust each other and can talk through their problem sensibly and calmly, as well as agreeing to disagree sometimes, are the ones who will still be together in five years. Research shows that 70 percent arguments go unresolved; couples who can deal with the issue at hand and avoid letting things fester and resurface are the real winner says Dr John Barletta, a relationship educator and senior lecturer in counseling.

Some of these essential elements to help resolve life’s little tiffs: Taking time out when things get heated, saying sorry when you’re wrong, maintaining physical contact (for example, holding hands) even when you’re arguing, and being willing to compromise. Also don’t forget the make-up sex afterwards, it can be a great way to reconnect and rescue lost intimacy.

Love Test #3 Are You A Perfect Match?

To know if your partner is the perfect match for you, think about the similarity both of you have. On the separate pieces of paper, list down important things happen since you’ve been together and answer few questions below.

- While living together, how many hours per week you would like to spend with your partner?

- How many times both of you having arguments per week?

- Do you believe there’s any percent of things in common between both of you?

- Do both of you ready every time the time to see parents come?

How did you answer compare to each other’s and how do they compare to what you’re doing now? Research shows that opposites don’t attract, so ideally your answers should be the same. Couples who relationship will have to stand the test of time should have answered: zero to the question about arguments, 20 or more to the one about hours spent together and 70 percent or above to the question about things in common. The important point here is are you ready to adopt your life into his life to live as one?

Love Test #4 Are You Interested In Your Partner’s Past?

Sit down together and on separate pieces o paper, list your partner’s top 10 characteristics. This can be positive or negative. The trick is to put down the first thing you think of, whether it honesty, forgetfulness or immaturity, so only give yourself 60 seconds. This test is the great indicator as to which relationship pattern you’re following, and whether it’s a destructive or healthy one. Often we tend to seek relationships with people that are similar to those we have had in the past. This is especially the case with the more difficult one, says Dr Bob Murray, psychologist and co-author of Creating Optimism. It’s generally not encouraging sign if you find that your partner’s qualities resemble those of a parent with whom you have had a troubled relationship.

However, it doesn’t necessarily spell doom. Discuss with your partner the behavior that’s bothering you and talk about how it could change. For example,  It’s very seldom to hear you praise or say you love me, it would be great if you could try to compliment me or voice out what’s in your heart at least once a day. To openly discuss with your partner will reveal each other true feelings. By this, both of you can know each other satisfactory since the relationship has started.

Love Test #5 Do You Meet Each Other’s Needs?

List the six things in order of priority that you think are most important to the other person in your relationship, and then list those that are most important to you. If you thought his number one would be devotion but he listed regular blow jobs, then there could be something wrong. The better you were able to predict each other’s responses, the more in sync the two of you are, and the more capable you are o meeting each other’s needs.

I commonly use this exercise when I see couples in my sessions; it’s a great way o determining what they want from the relationship, says Dr Charmaine Saunders, a therapist and author of six self-help books, including her latest publication, Winning Relationship. Those couples that list qualities such as spending time together respect, honesty, trust and communication are likely to go the distance.

  • Winsor Pilates

Comments

2 Responses to “5 Ways To Know If Your Relationship Will Last”
  1. Steve Hedger says:

    It great to see what others are saying about relationships. So many people don’t want to focus on their relationships so I totally respect those that have chosen to help others in this critical area.

    Steve

  2. If you love someone you should always try to make up with them.. It’s the only way!