10 SECRETS To Every Relationship Survival

It’s not easy to repair the broken relationship or to heal the broken heart but there’s a simple way to nourish and improve the relationship before it breakdown. Whether you’re out there looking for love or trying to navigate your way through a newish relationship, most women tend to set themselves a list of must haves. Mine are generally this: Funny, intelligent, dark hair, nice smile, good job, friendly face, follows club football, and a little bit taller than I am when wearing heels. With all these boxes checked, I’ve got my ticket to a successful relationship and lasting love, right? But, you’re wrong. A solid relationship isn’t about how cute you look together, the perfect home, great friends or even having similar interests. Those things just makes it look good on paper. So what does make a great partnership then? To find out, here’s certain things every couple needs for love to last long term, no matter how old you are or what life stage you’re in.

Secrets #1 Sense of Humor

It seems so  simple, but being able to laugh together can get you through even the most mortifying moments – public fights, bedroom bloopers, even Ben Stiller-esque meetings with the in-laws. and if you’re honest, you’re agree that the best moments spent in bed aren’t perfecting some organism tantric sex position, but lying there together  on weekends chatting and laughing about the week you’ve had. Priceless. And it’s not only improve the communication but at the same time tighten the internal emotion between you too. You can talk about what you both want in future or plan where you want to go for the next holiday.  

Secret #2 Little Gestures

Growing up, at least once a week, he come back home with a bar of almond-covered chocolates for you; it was your favorites. It’s a small thing but for both of you it’s shows  a deep feeling of appreciation. It’s the way how he want you to know that he cares and remember you. He bought it for you because he knew that you loves it, and it could make you smile. He didn’t care if it made you put on few kilos, all he knew that it will made you happy. Mum & Dad constantly do the little things for each other when they things no one watching. He help Mum washing plates after dinner and  tease her here and there… Mum mad and punish him to wash all the plates. Dad smiles, he knew Mum appreciate his help. Then they will watch movie together and it’s time for Mum to fight back Dad, she change the TV channels which made Dad arghhhh….well, Mum knew and quickly make a drink for Dad..his favorite drinks. Well, sometimes knowing what your partner needs could improve the relationship and make it alive all the time. Saying good morning when wake up in the morning and good night when you go to bed or send a SMS to him saying I Love You is some of little things that could save your relationship. These things might come thick and fast when you’re in the honeymoon period of a relationship, but when you’ve been together for years, these little acts make a big difference.  

Secret #3 Personal Space

Sometimes, you can’t live in each other’s pocket. You should have your own lives and so do him. It doesn’t meaning you leave apart or don’t care about each other doing, but by having your own lives, own friends, own interests will make you both more fulfill and rewarding. Being apart once a while is a good things where you can test your faithfulness, trust and loves. Not many couples that can stay apart from each other with faith or trust and keep living in happiness and peaceful. But with consistent practice by starting it from heading to different function or having lunch with friends instead of with him will create trust in the relationship. You can’t keep people on a leash, you’ve got to have trust. Being comfortable doing your own thing without reporting to your partner all the time makes the time spent together much more rewarding.

Secret #4 The Ability To Spend Hours Together  

The definition of true intimacy? Being comfortable enough in each other’s company to not say a word. Sitting at home on the couch with hangovers watching TV, backpacking through a foreign country; spending hours in the car on a road trip…… These moments are often the greatest test of any relationship. Ask yourself: Can you make decisions without wanting to kill each other? Are you capable of compromise? And, most importantly, how do you deal when something goes wrong? Because, when you’re tired in a confined space with no one else to buffer the situation and pushed to the limit, you’ve got your own personal D.day. Whether you’re ready or not, you’ll have in insight into how you’ll react to life’s bigger challenges.

Secret #5 Fight Rules

Everyone fights. That’s a given. What you need are guidelines, a list of unwritten rules on what’s fair and what isn’t. They vary from couple to couple but, generally, it’s a matter of not bringing up past mistakes when they’ve been dealt with and forgiven. Or not comparing each other to exes or family members. Something along the lines of “You sound just like your mother” is hitting below the belt. One couple I know have a rule that they never sleep on a fight. Another friend says she and her boyfriend have agreed to never give each other the silent treatment. These are all healthy arrangements, according to relationship expert Dr Leonard Felder, author of Wake Up or Break Up. “Also, no nasty remarks about anyone’s looks or jobs,” warns Dr Felder. “Even if you feel like ‘saying something hurtful because your partner has already said something to upset you, don’t got there. Take a ‘time out’ to gather your thoughts.”

Secret #6 A No-Rail Sex Position

When you first hook up, there’s always a period of wild, passionate, crazy, tear-your-clothes-off-and-don’t-get-out-of-bed-all-weekend sex. Why? It’s all about learning each other’s likes in the bedroom, trying different positions to see what  fits and spending endless hours being attentive to show your new partner what a great lover you are. But when the euphoric phase turns to routine, you need a couple of killer moves guaranteed to get each other off. You both work long hours and you get tired. sometimes you don’t have the energy to do the full-blown sex-goddess routine, but there the advantages to being that familiar and comfortable with each other. He knows what presses your buttons, so the odd quickie still satisfied both your appetites mid-week.

Secret #7 Attraction Beyond the Mirror

Sure the, my aforementioned must-have man checklist helps from an initial attraction, but that’s just a pretty cover to get me to open up a book and start reading. Let’s face it, neither of you are going to look the same five, 10 or 20 years down the tract. So, there has to be something more than just physical attraction. Having been married for 38 years, perhaps, my mum puts it best: Dad’s got grey hair and he wears his pants a bit higher than he did when we first met, but he’s still the same person,” she says.  

Secret #8 A Life-Changing Experience

Losing a job, having a business fail, one of you falling ill, the death of a family member….You wouldn’t wish these upon anyone, but they’re all facts of life. Going through something like this requires support and seeing each other at your absolute lowest point. You can’t help but bond in these distressing situations and, even if it tests the relationship, if you pull through, it definitely makes you stronger. Hillary and her partner suffered one the saddest experiences possible when they lost a child. “It was devastating. we were both completely shattered,’ she says. “You grieve with each other, but there’s no way you support. It made our relationship stronger and now I know we can make it through anything.”  

Secret #9 Belief In the Person

I once had a boyfriend who all my friends & family – me included -  thought I’d end up marrying. Then he had a career crisis. Even though it was his problem, it ended up being the catalyst for our break-up.  I was angry at him, thinking he was being immature and self-centered. The truth is, I didn’t have faith in his ability to get what he was aiming for in the work front. I never said it to his though – I probably didn’t realize it myself at the time – but he obviously sensed it. We all make mistakes. We’re emotional, sometimes our judgment is a little off. But in times of crisis, it’s vital to have a genuine belief in your partner, faith in their decency and abilities. And if you don’t really believe in them, why are you together in the first place?

Secret #10 Keeping Secret   

Keeping secrets is a big no-no, right? A diary, old love letters, a stash of money to spend on Gucci heels you know he’ll think are too expensive…. These are the kind of secrets that are okay top keep. “
You have too,” says Penny*, who has a weakness for erotic fiction that her boyfriend of five years knows nothing about. “It’s my guilty little pleasure, and no one knowing isn’t hurting anyone,” she says. “I’d never keep secret about the important stuff, but something like this is perfectly time. Having a little chunk of privacy ensures that you don’t feel stifled in a relationship. When you’re together for the long term, it gets harder to work out where one of you ends and the other begins. Self-identity is one method of keeping sane and happy. And if you’re not happy with yourself, you can’t really expect anyone else to be.