You just met him a few days ago, now he got your phone number. Then he asked you out for a date – from a simple walk, watching movie to a romantic candle light dinner. Less than one week you already know his best friend and now he wants you to get know all his friends closely. This is getting serious! You started to think. Does he really serious with me? Few weeks later, you become closer to him with his regular phone call and you’ve been accepting all his invitation to go out for almost every night which initiates your loving feeling and burning your desires to get know him deeper. He knows how to make you feel comfortable, desirable and passionate to the relationship. Cuddled on the dance floor, held hands over dinner and indulged in some heavy-duty, passionate kisses. It does generate great and strong feelings in you which make you think maybe he’s the one. After all, you think he’s perfect, he can’t stop telling you how wonderful you are and he won over your flat mate on first meeting.

You drown in his arm each time he appeal you and you have no regrets as long as he stay beside you. The feelings that he shows you with so many thoughts about him hunting your mind makes you can’t think straight. And once your relationship gets even more sexual the territory will become even more dangerous. But do you ever think if you do succumb to your desires – will it instantly bring you to a new and wonderful level of intensity and togetherness? Or will you wake up the next day worrying that he will mistakenly think you’re an easy conquest? When love attack, people become weak and blind – deny the fact that giving over the passion too soon is risky business that could leave awkward feeling, uncertain or heart broken.

Problem with sex… We all know how beautiful life at the beginning of the relationship is – shower by the greatest love and grab by purest heart. It’s like you’re eating turkey – each bite increases your expectation, same with relationship. When it finally reach the centre or come to the yummy point where you’re in a deep romance, you’re not sure whether to gobble it all up or save the best “till last”. And while your appetite is dazzling your sense, it’s hard to make a well-balanced decision. New love is every bit as tantalizing. It overwhelms your judgment, affects your self-perception and can trick you into seeing things the way you’d like them to be. Hooked on the high of that loving feeling, first or second date sex might seem like a natural progression. You both crazy about each other and can’t wait any longer to fall into the greatest romance and intimacy. I think it’s great if you both really clear about what going to bed means for both of you. But, make the wrong decision and you could end up feeling rejected. How about that? Are you very sure and clear with your decision?

The relationship counselor, Kaye Van De Graaf says, “A newly-formed relationship is a delicate thing which can be damaged by too much intimacy too soon. At the stage of romance you usually haven’t established enough intimacy to talk openly about your feelings.” So if you jump right in and have sex, what do you think might happen when you need to talk honestly to your partner? Are you ready to have a deep conversation and sure he will do the same to you? When both of you are not ready for all of this, it may make you feel like a wall has gone up between you. Although you have a fantastic sex with your partner, but if nobody starts to bring it into openly conversation, this might happen too. It can lead to plenty of tension because you’re now both worrying that you weren’t satisfying your partner.

No way back… Some people take seriously when it comes into sexually intimacy and some are not. To them, making love is about as close as two people can get, so it’s no wonder it marks a turning point in a developing romance. “Before a couple becomes sexually intimate, there is less emotional investment in their relationship. Once you take your relationship to a sexual level, the experience level is linked to very personal wants, desires and expectations about what sex means in terms of a deeper emotional attachment.” In other words the sensitivity of the feeling is higher than relationship that wouldn’t involves so much emotional attachment. So, when you’re tying into this kind of feeling, you’re much more easily influences by how he behaves in bed. You couldn’t avoid yourself from make your own judgment because you’re already put yourself into emotional relationship. That’s why the full-frontal frenzy of sex can sometimes turn a budding relationship into love, or bring it to a crisis point.

Responsibility, commitment or… Most of us still confuse what the real meaning of responsibility or commitment in early relationship especially when it comes into sex between men and women. Some think that when two people get physically, it means commitment should follow. That’s how most women always hope from their partner – commitment and responsibility. However, what men believe in sex is totally different than what women always think. For women, making love might be tied up with passion, romance and permanence. For guys, it could have more to do with arousal and release than love. The fact is men often find it easier to separate their physical and emotional feelings. It’s not there are not interested in love, it’s just that they may be living for the moment and not thinking that far ahead.

So, no wonder if after a wonderful sex at night, the next morning you’ll be surprise when he still assessing your long-term relationship potential. Well, well, well, that’s the tricky thing about first-time sex with a new man. There’re two things a man always leave with you – whether he will make you feel closer and more in love or he can leave you feeling uncertain and world apart. How can you assess whether having sex too early will harm rather than enhance your romance? That depends on what stage of relating your romance is at….

Making love after dating a few weeks… After few weeks of hot and heavy dates, you having sex with your partner for the first time and it happen suddenly without any preparation between you too. It just happens like that and no actions follow up after that moment. You or him just can’t think straightly whether it happen because you want it or accidentally without self-conscious. When you took things pretty quickly – things like this happen and make you a little bit confusing what actually happen between you too. Does he seriously want to be with you or he has other attention? At the same time, he might think the same way you’re thinking because you both still can’t talk and share with each other openly. When this kind of problems comes, you or he feels like a stranger, don’t feel comfortable with each other and don’t have enough trust on each other.

This kind of situation often happens in early relationship plus with deep intimacy too soon. Most relationships take a while before they’re strong enough to handle the intensity of sex. When you’re not totally open and comfortable with each other, you’re more likely to feel inhibited and self-conscious during and after sex. That’s why good communication before sex is crucial. To have a good communication, you need time to know each other more and a couple weeks together is not enough to developing trust to talk about emotions. “Mutual attraction is not the only basis for a healthy sexual relationship,” says psychologist, Rhea Thiering. “So, before you rush into having sex, take time to express your feelings to your new partner. You have an authority to explain your fears and needs and what sex means to you and discuss the implications of getting more physical.” To get save, trust your intuition. If you’re not sure of your boyfriend’s intentions, ask him what they are. And if you hesitate or not ready to have sex, say so. Take your time to know each other more and it could make all the difference between fumbled physical encounter and an evening of mind-blowing sex that leaves you both more in love than ever before.

Sex when you’ve only just met… This situation often occurs accidentally and when you realized you just made a mistake, he’s already leaved you without says any words. But, before you having sex, he has a very sweet-talking until you can’t differentiate whether he really means it or just doing it to get you. Why? For some guys, sex is something to try to coax woman into – they’ll tell you what you want to hear just to get to first, second and third base with you. This kind of man has a problem with closeness and commitment, so though you feel devastated, tell yourself that its better you discovered his true colors early on. There’s nothing like sex to prompt a guy to reveal his true feelings. If he cares for you and loves you, he will respect you as a woman and put a lot of attention to your pleasure and if he’s not serious about the relationship, he’ll leave you without saying any words. That’s all!

Guys and relationships are unpredictable and that’s why they’re exciting. There’s no way to tell how sex will change the romance or how it’ll make him feel about you and you feel about him. So, for girls out there, before you lose your head over a virtual stranger, never ever use sex to test his sincerity. Ask yourself: Do I know this guy well enough to sleep with him? Am I sure of his intentions towards me? Will sexual encounter be likely to make him more or less interested in me in a long term? Will I be happy with this decision in the morning? You know what to do if most of your answers are No or you could jeopardize the start of a beautiful thing! So, when it comes to passion, try to not let your heart rule your head. Take your time, test the water, get to know him and jump in only when you’re sure the water is fine. That way, you’ll never have to wonder that might have happened if only you’d taken more time.