When Your “Ex” Falls In Love

November 22, 2008 by  
Filed under Love and Intimacy

Why his story never stops even after you’ve split up? Why you still care about what happening in his life? And why you feel sad when you know he already fall in love with another girl? Do you still in love with him? It’s amazing how much you can still know about your ex even you both are not attached to each other anymore. It’s not possible when your girlfriends tell you where he’s living and partying: gossipers spill all they know about his flirtations and one-night stands; mutual mates try to say as little as possible, but you can read between the lines. When you ask if he ever talks about you and they pause awkwardly before saying, Yeah, sure, but he’s never been much of a talker, it’s like a stab to the heart “ it’s obvious “ he’s over you, he doesn’t think about you. End of story.

Meanwhile, you throw out the photos of your romantic holiday in Bali and make a stab at going on a few dates. You just start to feel you’re getting your life back together. But just when you thought you had erased him from your hard drive, you hear he’s in a new relationship. Within milliseconds, the pain is so great it feels like heâ’s just dumped you all over again. You know it’s not good to dwell on it and the more you learn about her, the more you feel your self-image slipping. But you just can’t stop asking questions about the new girl in his life and you torture yourself by imagining them in bed having marathon sex.

Well, sounds like you’re not as over him as you thought. Or maybe you don’t really want him back, but also don’t really want him back, but don’t want anyone else to have him either (at least not until you’ve found the love of your life to rub in his face). Before you turn into a complete nutter and find yourself staking out his flat to catch a glimpse of them, you need to get a grip. The burning issue here is not how he met her, what she looks like or whether or not he’s in love or not he’s in love or just in lust. The bigger question is what you are going to do to ensure that you just don’t care. Read more

8 Questions To Ask Before Marriage

November 1, 2008 by  
Filed under Relationship

Are you on the mood to turn your single life to marriage tune? If you’re ready make sure your partner also ready to ride a same boat with you. A happy marriage is not just based on wine and romance, it’s equally important to ensure your compatibility concerning future goals, expectations and priorities. Are you sure you’re ready for the journey? Are you sure your partner really want it? If you’re still 50-50, then it’s a time to ask yourself and your partner is this the life you really wanted the most? What kind of wedding will you have? Celebrant or priest? A white dress or something in flaming red? Before we even meet the right man, most of us fantasise about our ideal wedding celebration. But when it comes to living happily ever after, whether you should have an up do or flowing curls is the least important question you should be asking.

Most couples talk more about their wedding than life after the honeymoon. But it’s this nuts and bolts relationship stuff (like how many kids you plan to have or whether you want to move overseas), that will influence whether or not your relationship will last to the distance. By discussing your fears, hopes, plans and aspirations beforehand you’ll be able to work out what you agree on and how you’ll negotiate those differences. Here, questions you need to ask before you’re ready to take the plunge: Read more